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Unlocking The Eyes, Part I


"The eyes are the window to the soul", so the old saying goes. This is true?., your eyes do reveal more about your feelings than any other part of your body. If you want to know what another person is really thinking, or how they truly feel, look into their eyes. Many clues and much insight can be gathered by simply maintaining good eye contact throughout the course of a conversation. While the language of the eyes may vary by situation and environment, it is one of the most accurate ways to gauge interest, or lack of. During your next conversation, watch carefully, the eyes of your companion and see if the eyes reveal what the mouth is saying.

We've all heard some of the basic body language decoders; downcast eyes are a sign of deception or lying. While we cannot discount the importance of such signals, the eyes reveal far more than signs of deception. When the eyes are looking upwards, it's a sign that the person with whom you're speaking is thinking. That thinking can be a sign of deception, or a simple attempt to recall a previous thought. How you interpret eyes facing the sky depends greatly on the situation. During a speech or presentation, upward facing eyes may just reveal an attempt to remember facts or recall previously written statements. During a casual conversation, however, that same movement can indicate uncertainty or deception.

Downcast eyes are generally a sign of deception, but there are other hidden meanings to that sign. For example, looking down as you engage in a conversation doesn't indicate lying, but it may reveal an attempt to dominate the other person. By staring down while engaging in a conversation, you reveal a lack of respect or interest in what the other person is saying. By that same token, looking down can also indicate that you are the submissive partner in this conversation. If, while listening to someone else speak, your eyes are looking down, this could be your way of letting the speaker know that they are in control, and by contrast, you are under their control.

Although often attributed to flighty or ditzy girls, a sideways glance is a sign of keen interest in a topic or object. This is most often attributed to women, because this is a way for a woman to show a man that she's interested in what he's saying. Nevertheless, a sideways glance is a general indicator that what you're saying --or hearing- is interesting enough to hold your attention. Sideways glances, however, should not be confused with lateral eye movements, which mean something entirely different. Lateral eye movements are a general sign of lying. When a person shifts their eyes side-to-side, you can be fairly certain that they are being less than truthful, as their side-to-side glance indicates their need to 'escape'. Likewise, this glance can also indicate that the person is conspiring with another, and the glance is simply an attempt to make sure no one else is listening.

One of the most difficult eye movements to decode, is the gaze. The gaze can mean so many things that trying to decipher it, may seem like an impossible task. During general conversations, gazing is a way to show that you are listening to, and interested in, what the other person is saying. While the gaze doesn't indicate a keen interest like the sideways glance, it is a clear indicator of interest. Gazing can have a more direct meaning, when the gaze is aimed at a particular part of the body. For example, gazing at the mouth is a sign that you want to kiss that person, whereas gazing at sexual regions is a sign that you want to engage in sexual activity with them. This gaze is most prevalent during interactions with the opposite sex.

Sometimes, eye movements can be more threatening and insulting, especially during the up and down gaze, which indicates that you're 'sizing up' the other person. Sizing up another person can be an attempt to assess an existing threat, potential sexual partner, or to establish dominance over another person. This gaze says, 'let's look at you to see if you impress me.' Although it can be intimidating, it's important that you're mindful of how your eyes connect with another person, or their body. Sending the wrong signal in an inappropriate environment can spell the end of a career, or potential relationship.

These are just a few ways to unlock the meaning of eye movements; there are plenty of other ways to convey your true emotions. It's important that, when you try to decipher eye movements, you take it in context of the environment and setting, not your own insecurities. Often, decoding eye movements is only done when a slight is felt. Very rarely do you see people trying to figure out if that seductive glance was indeed seductive, as those kind of eye movements are much easier to decode.

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©2021 by Tonya Reiman

Conviently located in New York